Battle Of The Sexes

what i am implying may be taken into offence, some of the following paragraphs of this post may contain harsh personal opinions about different circumstances in ordinary relationships.

I'll get straight to the point. i personally have a major belief in violence against both women and men. domestic violence takes place in most households in the world 30 of every 1,000 females and 45 of every 1,000 males are victims of severe violence committed by their spouses. i hate hearing stories about divorces and unfaithful commitment and worse of all, the Jerry Springer scenarios we have in this period of time. I’m going to be a little bit bias here, that's only because i am speaking the truth! I'm not going to talk about specific men but generals males. some men in relationships don't give a flying fuck! by that i mean that they are willing to break a woman's heart for something they selfishly want to an extent. okay so its not just males but the outstand females, ladies know when to stop and have clear vision of  downfall and what could happen if…! so relationships aren't perfect but its the obvious things that us individuals can do to change circumstances and situations to prevent the conflict from actually happening.

• males need to understand that when a girl talks to you, she is interested in your opinion about what she is saying even if she isn't asking you a question. and ladies, please don't talk constantly into the poor guys ear’s once he has come from a hard day’s work.
• most normal ladies like keeping their house clean, unlike my scummy old neighbour who lived alone, manless and loved smoking indoors and eating bacon in a kitchen filled with baby roaches. my point is, when she’s doing the vacuum, don’t wait for her to tell you to lift your legs up while your eye’s are glued to the television sett.
• guys should consider that women are at home cleaning, taking care of the kids, preparing meals, and having duties of their own.
• girls should consider that males wake up early in the morning to go to their jobs for income not pleasure. only to at least provide bread on the table. okay so construction workers and builders don’t get the same pay as lawyers do. but they work harder and get income out of it. even though lawyers worked even harder to become what they are and get pleasure, success and great income out of it. so consider that some males are living with the regret of less knowledge but still work and ladies need to appreciate small efforts that are usually big for them but small for us.
• be honest with your man for he will return it.

SIMPLE KEY POINTS.- for both female and male.

1. It's not fair to the other person to depend on them to heal your wounds.
It's not even fair to yourself. Hold your inner child and heal.

2. You can either communicate or vent. Not both. Don't try to work things out
when you're overcharged with emotion. Discharge your emotions first,
by yourself, then communicate.

3. We all just want to be seen. If we can express our own pain or fear,
or see the pain or fear in our partner, instead of getting stuck in anger or blame, we'll move forward.

4. Use the inner clearing process to communicate when you can't "say anything" and everything to the person directly.

5. Under stress we all regress.

6. The 10% rule and it's corollaries:
A. Only 10% of what we're feeling in any situation -- anger, bitterness, fear, jealousy, pain, etc. -- has to do with what's in front of us. The other 90% is from old stuff -- childhood wounds -- triggered by the present situation.
B. It is therefore not fair to blame or attribute all of, or even most of, the pain to the present situation or other person.
C. If we use the triggering of the 90% to take the time to clear and heal our old
wounds, we'll avoid having to have the universe send more triggering situations to us.
D. We'll react less in the future if we have taken the time to feel through and
clear the past.

7. It is a privilege, not a right, to be listened to by our partner.

8. The quickest way to heal interpersonally is to make taboo all references to the injurious events -- for a period of time -- while instead acting only nicely and kindly to the other person. Kill them with love.

9. Make joint decisions in a relationship. Don't just lay your agenda on the other person, trying to convince them of your point of view.

10. Listen when listening is needed, and provide potential solutions/suggestions when that is requested.

11. Your map of reality is not anyone else's. Don't presume you understand the other's motivation, buttons, needs, instead ask the other to help you "learn their book" and how they see things, what they react to most, and what ways they want you to approach and comfort them.

Sarah ♥